Falling
by unnbrella
Summary: Fourteen-year-old Clementine reunites with Lee again.


**A/N:** So I always wondered what it would be like between Lee and an older, hardened Clementine and this is what I came up with! Enjoy!

 **Summary:** Fourteen-year-old Clementine reunites with Lee again.

* * *

Clementine never did enjoy being around others. Well, maybe a few years ago she did, but now? Now she figures it's just better to be alone. That way she only worries about herself, no one else. But the thing about that is, there's no one there to catch her when she falls, and all that she's left with is her thoughts. Her thoughts that can sometimes be hopeful for a better tomorrow, or sometimes they're just so dark and morbid that even she can't believe herself.

God, she's just so tired she can't even think straight. Endlessly defending herself and scavenging for supplies day and night has left her with almost no sleep and an empty stomach. But it's like she can't even feel anything anymore because she's so used to it. Acknowledging it will only make it worse, so she just sits there silently, accepting it. Accepting _everything_. Afraid to go to sleep because of her nightmares.

She often finds herself dreaming of what could've been. Like, what could her life be like if things had gone differently? What if none of this shit ever happened and she still had a place to call home and a family like any normal kid should?

 _Family_. She scoffs at the thought. Does it even exist anymore?

She sighs heavily and rests her head on the wall behind her, closing her eyes. Her knees are hugged tightly to her chest. What if she could stop thinking so much when it's pointless? That's a thought.

Time passes by in silence and at this point she doesn't even know if she fell asleep or not. Feeling completely out of it, she slowly rolls her head to the side when she suddenly catches sight of a tall, dark figure standing a short distance away from her.

She blinks and looks up, peering through the darkness, and it takes a few moments for her eyes to really focus before her body suddenly freezes up, and she's no longer feeling anything at all.

She stares longingly, completely speechless. How could this be? It's not possible. All this time she's told herself that he is never coming back. That what happened could never be undone, and that she would live on her whole life with this feeling of emptiness and despair, clinging onto her as if it were the only thing left in this world that were really hers forever.

"Lee…?" Her voice is just above a whisper, and she sounds uncertain, as if she is afraid of what the answer might be. She subconsciously pushes herself to her feet, her eyes never leaving his.

"Hey, sweet pea."

And it's _that voice_ , that voice that she hasn't heard in five years. She's hearing it for real, and it isn't in her head this time. It was always that voice that got her through everything she has been through up to this point. It gave her the strength and the bravery to do the things she was afraid to.

It's as soft and comforting as she remembers. It's all she needs for her entire self to completely shatter, and crumble apart for the first time in those five lonely years, and the next thing she knows she's latching onto him so tight, afraid to ever let go. Her arms are wrapped securely around his waist and she's sobbing, almost silently. Sobbing like she was during her last moments with him.

Lee wraps his arms around her instantly, needing this just as much as she does, and she feels so safe in that moment that she only holds onto him tighter by the second.

"I know…" she hears him cooing softly and feels one of his hands cradling the back of her head, the side of his face resting on top of her hat. The dirty old thing.

"I've missed you," Her eyes are squeezed shut and her voice is broken and muffled with her face buried in his tear-stained shoulder.

"I've missed you too, sweetheart," he reassures her and Clementine realizes how desperately she wanted to hear him say those words to her.

A long while of comforting silence passes by before the two finally break apart, Lee gently gripping her shoulders and pushing her away so he can get a good look at her.

He's never seen her look so broken. Her face is wet with tears and her brown eyes appear tired and grieving. She looks so very, very tired.

"Look at you, all grown up," He cups her face in his palms and tilts her chin up ever so slightly so her eyes finally meet his. He wipes one of her tears away with his thumbs. "You look beautiful," he says, and it's true, even if she does have tears streaming down her face. "You're almost as tall as me now, aren't you?"

At that, her expression finally softens and her shoulders relax as she lets out a breathy chuckle, like she had been holding her breath.

It's true. Lee no longer needs to bend down to reach her eye level. Her hand raises to her cheek to gently rest on top of his with the faintest smile on her lips.

"Lee, I…" She tries to sputter out the words, but there's so much she wants to say to him and yet, she can't think of anything at all. She hesitates, her breath caught in her throat, then she bursts into tears again.

"It's all my fault," she cries. Her voice sounds a lot louder than she had intended and her gaze suddenly drops to the floor as she takes the tiniest step away from him, but he doesn't dare let go of her.

"If I hadn't believed that man really had my parents. If I never even had that stupid radio in the first place…" she's gasping for air now and she's shaking her head as if she can't believe any of it. She's so angry with herself and Lee can barely even understand what she's saying between her sobs. "And then you got bit…"

"Hey, hey," Lee urges her a few steps backwards and sits her down, speaking reassuring words to her in hushed whispers, and it takes everything in him to stay strong for her from seeing her like this.

"You can't think like that. Nothing that happened was your fault, Clem." He kneels in front of her and tightly grips her hand in his, looking up at her.

She doesn't respond, figuring that she won't be able to choke out words even if she tried. She quickly wipes her palm across her cheek, realizing that she hasn't cried like this in years. She's never allowed herself to.

"Tell me you haven't been alone all this time." He tilts his head, afraid to hear the answer. Still, he has to know.

"No…" she responds, and Lee almost lets out a sigh of relief, his chest no longer so tense. "I found people, but… it never ended well."

All Lee can do is just stare at her with a heartbroken expression on his face, wanting to tell her so much. Wishing he could always be with her so she would never have to be alone.

"I-I've thought about you every single day." She speaks slowly while staring at the ground, clearly reflecting to all those lonely times.

"I know you're hurting inside," he begins, and she breaks at that, wincing just from hearing those truthful words spoken aloud. "But you're not alone. No matter how dark things get, I want you to know that I will always be with you."

And it isn't until she no longer feels his hands covering hers that she looks up. He's standing now, and her eyes are suddenly brimming with worry.

"You're strong, Clementine. No matter what anyone tells you, there is nothing in this world that you can't handle." His voice is fading away now, as if it is echoing inside her head.

"Please…" she can barely breathe past the lump in her throat and she wonders if he can even hear her. "Please… don't leave me." But he's already gone, and she doesn't even have the strength to move.

Her chest tightens and she's frozen, just sitting there, staring aimlessly ahead, and feeling more desperate than she ever has in her entire life.

She puts a hand over her mouth attempting to muffle her sobs, but realizes she can't, even if she tried. Her forehead heavily falls into her hand and she leans forward, her other forearm resting across her lap. Her shoulders shake as she cries, and she sits there for what feels like hours, wishing she could just put a stop to this never-ending pain. Because no matter how much that fraction of hope allows her to cling to the people she loves, she'll always be alone in the end.


End file.
